Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Drink Baby Drink

As most people know, since I'm not shy about telling everyone, I nursed Jake until he was 2...he never used a bottle, never even tasted formula..
And as most nursing moms know breastfed babies eat quite often...sometimes it seems like it never stops..well my experience with breastfeeding has apparently paid off for LO...

How you may ask?  Well I'll tell you...
Since LO was about a 1 1/2 months old she would eat about 3 ounces of formula, never more then that and sometimes even less.  We were feeding her about every 2 hours...it was (is) very tiresome sometimes...but hey...that's what happens when you breastfeed so I just chalked it up to baby behavior..
At her 4 month check up I asked the doctor about LO's feeding behavior...every time I switch her to a faster nipple she seems like she's gagging and yet the slow nipple seems to tire her out and she gives up drinking.  The doctor decided that the best thing would be to have LO go for a Speech Therapy consult to see if there was some issues with her muscle tone in her jaw. 

So off we went to see what was going on..
And well, she has no gag reflex, she doesn't have proper suction/feeding technique, and she is very sensory tactile (which apparently is an issue at this age).  The therapist said we should also keep an eye on her because she might have a sensory processing disorder. 

So what does this have to do with breastfeeding?  Well these are all issues that would have been noticed in the first few weeks of nursing and though they would have caused a nursing mom some issues, a skilled lactation consultant would have been able to help correct some of the issues by proper mouth placement.
Talking to the therapist helped me feel better, I thought I was over reacting..but what really made me feel good was the therapist said that most of the babies that she sees with LO's issues are severly underweight..and the fact that she is at the proper weight shows how well I read/respond to her cues and that my experience as a breastfeeding mother is what helped the most.  Since I was already subconsciously prepared to be feeding almost constantly.

So over the next few months we are doing physical therapy...she has been switched to a different nipple, a different type of pacifier.  We have to use this funky chewy tube thing when ever we are just sitting around. And I have to do this cheek exercise and a lip exercise..and that's just for this week.  Next week there are some other things we have to start..she didn't want to overwhelm me..(ha ha)

So the good thing about this whole situation is that by catching this early her eating, swallowing, and speech won't be affected..

All because I was a breastfeeding mom!


Friday, January 14, 2011

The Twilight Zone-House of Mirrors..

So, yesterday was my son's 17th birthday...I spent some time thinking back about my excitement of bring this wonderful fabulous new life into the world.  I wanted the best for my son so I breastfed, did all the required attachment parenting techniques..and look at what it got me? 

(First some background..my son had a really close friend when we lived in Las Vegas..his name was Charles they rode the bus together in elementary school, I haven't seen him in about 5 years..please keep this in mind when you look at the screenshots below...)

This is a screen from my son's facebook page..

Okay..so I was a little confused..I assumed that CHARLES was now calling himself CHARLIE...and my son's friends were trying to straighten me out!

I have now totally embarrassed Jake and he has stepped in and sorted his mom out...I'm not sure why this deserves a double facepalm..but...okay...I'm trying to just be humorous about this..

BTW my son came in and said...CHARLES is a completely different name the CHARLIE..really? I mean, Charlie could be Charles and just chooses to be called Charlie as a nickname...Jake's name is Jacob but we call him Jake!  When I pointed this out..he started telling me last names..like I remember those..gee!

Then this appears this morning...

WTH???  I shouldn't be on the internets???  Just cuz I was confused by a name? ? And do I really deserve to have an Audi call me out? 

Well I guess I'm going to stop commenting on my son's FB page as it is a house of mirrors and I became lost and confused..

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

430am, TedTalks, and Taboo's

It's 430 in the morning and I'm laying in bed wondering what the HELL am I doing?

How did I end up with sleepless nights, dirty diapers, and a car seat again. Why did I decide this was a good idea?

Yesterday I watched a Tedtalk  by Rufus Griscom and Alisa Volkman about Let's Talk about Parenting Taboos, Rufus and Alisa are the founders babble.com, the couple talk about four things that not really get discussed when you embark on the journey of parenthood.

1. That you will fall in love with your child the minute it's born..

Obviously this wouldn't be the case for me, I wasn't emotionally invested before the birth..it took a while to develop love for LO...I was willing to fight like a grizzly (terrible metaphor but appropriate) the minute they handed her to me, but I didn't love her right off the bat...the shock of being a parent again had to wear off first. 

2. That it's lonely to be a parent..

They are right about this in some cases..when I had my son, whom I successfully retrieved from the correct airport on Sunday, I was living with my parents but I had developed a relationship with some LLL moms which helped with the first few weeks but then I began to miss my home in Idaho and I began to miss my friends. Military families living on base tend to develop close friendships. They tend to put families that are close in rank together, you are sharing the same financial woes, the same loss of a spouse to temporary deployments, and the same hassles so it was a close nit community that helped with loneliness. 

This time around I'm struggling a bit more, I don't have a close nit group of friends, I am a totally different person that most people here in Wisconsin..I have different views on religion, parenting, and life then your average Wisconsinite.  So I have to say that yes I'm noticing some loneliness.  I have reached out to several groups, LLL (it's kind of weird to break out a bottle in the mist of nursing but hey..a kids gotta eat) and a babywearing group-Green Bay Babywears.  Hopefully this will ease my loneliness some. 

3. You can't talk about a miscarriage-

Well I've never had a miscarriage as I was only able to conceive once so I can't talk about that but I can talk about having a hysterectomy...Though it was medically necessary for me to have a hysterectomy, I still struggled with loss..It felt like a loss of womanhood..that I had been propelled in to cronehood much sooner then I wanted.  I feel felt like I was no longer a complete woman.  Any option I felt I had, like having another baby was taken from me..even though at the time I didn't want another baby..it was weird.

4.  You can't say that your average happiness has declined...

They show a chart from the book Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert that shows your happiness declines until your first child leaves for college.  I have to admit that I was pretty unhappy back in the days when Jake was younger and my happiness level was steadily rising the older he got..He is capable of taking care of his needs without much intervention from me..so I was freer to pursue my wishes.  Then LO showed up..has my level of happiness declined?  I'm not sure..I know that she makes me really happy at times, not so happy at 3am when she's gotten up again..but then when she snuggles down and smiles in her sleep well I forget all about the fact that its 3am. 

A taboo that I think we should talk to parents about is your relationship with each other will change.  There is nothing you can do about it just face it, accept it, and grow from it.  There isn't much sex the first few months, then what there is is quick and maybe not quite like it once was, but like the happiness chart, if you can hang on to each other through the childhood years your relationship will get better. 

What is a taboo that you think we as patents should tell new or expecting parents?

Monday, January 3, 2011

Menu-Planning and Meatless Mondays and The Compact

A twitter friend of mine Abbie over at Farmer's Daughter posted her goals for 2011 and one of those goals was to participate in the "I'm Not Buying It" challenge.  Basically the I'm Not Buying It challenge is based on "The Compact" a group started in 2006 with the intention of not buying new items for 1 year.  The I'm Not Buying It challenge is for 6 months or what ever you want to try.
Since LO has been in my life I have noticed that my spending has gone through the roof..I mean..the Daily Tea Collection is to die for, and I didn't have an infant girl that I got to dress up in cute little outfits, and I've lost 20 pounds so I get new clothes too..right..oh and I have to have books to read on my iPad!  So basically I have been a spending fool and I have to get control of myself....
I'm not sure I can do 6 months..that is a REALLLLLLYYYYYYYY long time..(okay not really, but it seems like it) so I have decided that I'm going to shoot for 2 months with the option of extension if I'm doing well..

Here are my ground rules:

1. Not to buy anything new for 2 months either in store or online..
Exceptions:     Food-but I am going to try and stick to menu's and not over buy, which I have the habit of doing.
                        Diapers (I have to have disposables for visitations)
Bottles, nipples and pacifiers
Underwear and Socks
                       Running shoes (If I ever get back to running again)
Services-because my job requires me to “be the face” of my company I have to have haircuts and color, I stretch this as long as I can usually once every three months, but I have to have it.
                        Medications, vitamins and glasses
Washing Machine-I know I can get a used one, but I'd rather get a new washer and a used dryer.
Work Trips-If I'm away on a trip and I need something new as long as its small I can purchase it..means I can't just go shopping at Kohl's because I'm away.
                       Expendables-tires for the car, light bulbs, etc
2. To borrow, barter or buy used.
                       For items I buy used-one in/one out. So if I buy a used pair of jeans I have to donate or recycle a pair of pants or shorts.

3. To have a gift and exceptions budget of $300.00 (except for a washer of course)

We'll see how it goes. This is a tougher challenge then blogging everyday for a month.

So in keeping with my new Compact...my Menu for the week:  

Monday-Curried Butternut Squash Soup with Coconut Milk with Gruyere Grill Cheese Sandwiches
Wednesday-Pasta Carbonara
Thursday-work trip
Friday-Work trip
Saturday-Ricotta Pancakes with Strawberries

Sunday-Salt-Roasted Porkloin with Fingerling Potatoes

So what do you think?  Do you think you could stop buying anything new for 2 months, 6 months or even 1 week?  Let me know in the comments below!

Saturday, January 1, 2011


I want to talk about being a mother today..I'm not talking about the kind where you just donate the egg and think that's all there is too it...I'm talking about the kind where you sacrifice..
You sacrifice your time, your energy, your ability to sit down because you love the child so much.

I'm writing this post standing up and on my EVO because LO needs a nap..I tried laying her down and she promptly woke up..so I threw on my sling and I'm doing the mommy hip swing. (You mommies know the one I'm talking about...I figured I'd have to relearn it when I decided to take in LO but surprise, surprise its like riding a bike, you don't forget.)
And so I'm standing in my kitchen, listening to the sound of sweet snoring...I have plenty of things I could be doing..laundry, cleaning, bookwork, my expense report, but its more important to me that LO get her nap. I'm sacrificing! And loving it!
Attachment Parenting seems so daunting to some people. When you tell them that you babywear they look at you like your crazy..I try to explain how important it is to babies, but their response generally is to tell me I'm going to spoil her.  I know better...even though my son is shy he's not spoiled, he does what I ask him to do..he helps when I need it.
People think its forever, what they don't realize is that attachment parenting isn't helicopter parenting, The whole goal of attachment parenting is to create independence.  It's a type of parenting the teaches your children to be independent responsible teenagers and adults.  And isn't that what we as parents want?  To raise babies that grown into well functioning adults? 
Maybe during this new decade, this new year we should focus more on being attached to our children then on wars, terrorism, and the Jones'.  Maybe we need to live more simply and stay home loving our babies...
What do you think?  Are you a parent that practices attachment parenting?  Do you want to  live more simply this year?  Let me know in the comments below!